Lucky...

I was thinking the other day about the day when my student loan will be finally paid off. As you know from my previous posts I still have just under $15,000 to payoff.

Let me tell you, paying off all of my debt (student loans, credit card debt, car loan, etc.) has been a major struggle for me.  I have been in debt up to my ears for the last 10 years.  However, I'm sure that the day that I announce to my friends and peers that I have finally paid off my student loans I will receive many comments about how "lucky" I am to have paid off my loans.  Already, in just speaking to friends and peers many have commented how lucky I will be to have my student loan paid off next year.   I have said numerous times to so many people how "lucky" they were when they had money to do something cool.  Wow, just thinking about that irritates me.  I don't feel lucky at all, I feel beat down and run over.  I have had to sacrifice so much just to be able to get as far as I am and I still feel so far behind.  Man, I wish I had been socking money away in the stock market for the last ten years.  I feel like I don't make enough money and that even after all of my debt is paid off, I don't think I'll have enough money to adequately save for retirement and have a little fun.  Life is so stressful.  While I am extremely grateful for all of my blessings and the knowledge and passion to manage my finances, I don't at all feel lucky.  I feel like I have worked hard to get a law degree and worked my way up through the years to get a decent salary.  Nothing about my journey so far as felt easy or lucky.